Goodnight And Farewell

The darkness covers the landscape like a thick blanket across a bed of fresh, crisp linen. As I stand outside my apartment gazing skyward, through the outline of the barren trees the stars begin to wink at me to bid goodnight and farewell. Such peace overtakes my body, I feel at rest and ready to head off to bed. But suddenly, my mind begins to race with a million thoughts a minute. Thoughts of people with struggles much greater than mine. My struggle tonight it seems will be sleep itself as many faces run through my mind like a time-lapsed movie, morphing themselves to clear consciousness Physically I am tired and ready, but my mind will not allow itself to shut down for the night. I think of my sister struggling in her fight for life and wholeness. The disease that is invading her body, and the long road she faces to find wellness. I think of my Mom and Dad, worrying about my sister and all of us kids. I think of my brothers, with their own struggles and restless thoughts. I think of those I know struggling to make ends meet in these tough economic times. I think of those that worry for their uniformed loved ones in harm's way in faraway lands. I think of those that might read this that are struggling with some of life’s heavy burdens. I hope the solutions will find their way to you soon. I even think a selfish thought. If I can’t sleep tonight, how will I feel in the early morning as I rise to greet the day and ready myself for work? Why do I care so much? Why do I let so many things occupy my thoughts? I guess I must come to grips with the fact that I am a feeling human being, sensitive to my surroundings and to those I love and care about. It is a burden sometimes to care, but I must embrace it, it is who I am. It will eat me alive if I don’t, and cause too many sleepless nights if I run from it. Maybe that is the key, to accept the burdens we have before us and not say “Why me?” Maybe, just maybe for me, I should be saying “Why not me?” I am feeling peace from within now. My brain has allowed my hand to speak for it, to clear the clutter, to pick up the pen, and translate its burdens on paper to see with honest and true clarity. I am feeling at ease now. Relaxed and truly peaceful. At last, I can now return to the stars offering goodnight and farewell.